Real Life

"I was an intense fetus! I was in the womb like arghrrghaghrghaaarghrghagrrrrghgh!" -Crystal, before going on to explain that she intentionally pinched-off her own umbilical cord to experience sensory deprivation as a means to prepare herself for the harsh world outside...

She was serious.

Arousal

Crystal: "Are the white sheets arousing you?"
Me: "...why would they be arousing me?"
Crystal: "Because they're clean!"

She did laundry today...

Bonus bedding related quote. While trying to draw a parallel to the flat sheet on a bed, Crystal once referred to it as the foreskin of bedding...

More Children

"EW! CHILDREN!"

-Crystal as a family with a few kids rode by us on bikes. She later expounded by describing them as "freaky children talking squeebly."

Bad Deal

"How can you love me..."

-Crystal to me as she lamented an impulse buy and the extra $7 this "bad deal" cost.

March Madness

Crystal's response after her bracket started going down...

(She originally picked each win based on which logo she liked best)

"That's where I went wrong. I should have picked based on jerseys..."

Stress...

Yesterday Morning while waking up: "I'm really stressed. I think it's because I have so much work to do."

Phone call one hour later: "Remember how I thought I was stressed out? I actually just had to poop."

Forehead

"It's like, all of a sudden all of these things are looking at me that weren't there before."

-Crystal, referring to my forehead wrinkles and why she's so distracted by them.

The Nations

You may have noticed that, when telling a story, Crystal sometimes looks up, to the side, and to the distance when she's relaying something that she said.

I pointed this out to her tonight after one such story.

Her response: "I know. I'm speaking to the nations."

Harry Potter

A text I got from Crystal today: Theres a lotta harry ptter kids here in uniforms.

I would have been really confused if I hadn't been on campus earlier and seen the Future Farmers of America meeting...

Young and Frisky

Leaving small group last night, Crystal and I were talking about the topic of the evening, the Sabbath. Directly in the middle of one of her sentences, right in between "the" and "Sabbath," without missing a beat she poignantly asks... "am I young and frisky?"